According to the ground-breaking survey I started 12 months ago – collecting responses from over 1500 men – us guys are much more forgiving of infidelity than previously thought.
In fact, 71% of “cuckolded” men responded they still loved their wives, despites the fact that the wives had had affairs.
Here are the actual results:
These results are significant, and suggest that the typical male belief that “if she ever cheated, I’d be outta there in a heartbeat” doesn’t hold true when push comes to shove.
In fact, several other findings shed even more light on the topic:
FINDING #1: Men Desperately Want To Save Their Marriages (Still)
- Only 7.9% of the men polled said they didn’t want to save their marriages.
- 92% said they either wanted to save their marriages, or they weren’t sure
This suggests the overwhelming majority of men do not pull the “divorce trigger” when their wife has an affair. They have a strong motivation to keep their families and family intact, despite their internal pain and trauma.
FINDING #2: Men’s Emotional Trauma Is Their Biggest Ever
- 91.1% of men surveyed said their wife’s affair was the hardest thing they ever went through.
- Only 8.9% had been through worse events (examples are military duty, death of multiple family members over a short period of time, severe hospitalizations)
Most men are unprepared for the sheer force of emotional devastation affairs bring. Few ever suspect that this event would be the hardest they ever face.
WHY THESE FINDINGS ARE IMPORTANT
The fact that men are willing to “work through” infidelity in their marriage – despite the soul crushing pain of the emotional trauma – is testament to the desperation many men feel.
This despereation is fueled by the fact that most men – as well as women – never seriously consider infidelity as a threat to their marriage… until it’s too late.
We as a society must overcome our taboo on discussing the prevalence of affairs if we are to address this problem directly – and save ourselves from this most basic and archetypcal of human pains.
ABOUT KEVIN JACKSON:
Kevin Jackson is an internationally recognized relationship expert who, after being betrayed himself, has gone on to help thousands of men recover quickly from their wife’s affair. He is the author of Survive Her Affair, creator of the exclusive Survive Her Affair Online Forum, and has designed a proven 4-step approach that allows men to successfully heal from infidelity. He’s available for interviews and speaking engagements.